Passenger 57 - The Stupid Version
by steve.piers
Summary: In the ten minute read of your life, Wesley Snipes leaves his family life to become John Cutter, Head of Airline Security in the movie Passenger 57. But is Wesley Snipes actually John Cutter and why does everyone around him appear to be living a double life as well? Could he simply be drinking too much Hot Chocolate, or is something more stupid going on?


Passenger 57 – The Romantic Comedy.

Featuring love, romance and roundhouse kicks to the face.

Starring Wesley Snipes as John Cutter. Also starring Elizabeth Hurley as Elizabeth Hurley.

John Cutter had struggled to maintain his title as The Best in Airline Security. His mind just wasn't on the job like it was before he lost Lisa. By day, John would teach the staff of Pan-Amarhat Airways how to use advanced kung-fu skills to roundhouse kick any potential hostage taker square in the face but by night John would sit in the airline lounge, his hands wrapped tightly around a glass of hot chocolate, despite the airport being miles from his place of work and even further from his apartment.

His meagre wage, more befitting of a common-or-garden security guard was not the remuneration worthy of a man considered the best in his field. After paying the rent on his apartment, water bills, electric, council tax and God knows what else there was barely enough left to pay for fuel for his evening airport trips, and yet every night he made the same pilgrimage and thought about Lisa, always in black and white flashbacks, furiously edited to make them exciting, yet unclear. John knew that if anyone in that airport bar could read his mind, they'd know there was a tragic incident in John's past, he'd lost Lisa, he loved Lisa, but not know exactly what had happened yet.

John used his time at the airport to think; to go over the images in his mind and to torture himself by reliving that day, every day. Could he have saved her? Did he have control of his own mind that day? Was he ever in a position to save that poor young girl from what happened that tragic afternoon? She knew that John had been leading a double life. She understood that their relationship was a sham, and yet at the same time the deepest love that two people could feel.

John hated the deceit, but he had to live with the life he had chosen. To so many people in his life he was John Cutter, the head of security at Pan-Amarhat Airways. But this was a facade, a lie, and John knew it. Every day he put on his uniform and a car would be sent to take him to work. He would spend his entire shift training airline staff and beating up bad guys, with roundhouse kicks to the face. But by night he adopted his other identity, his other life. He'd return home to his wife that Lisa had known nothing about. Because John Cutter was not John Cutter. He was Wesley Snipes, the actor. His wife and family however had never watched any of his movies, and had no idea of his secret life. If Mrs Snipes, his wife of eight years, found out about Lisa it would rip their family apart.

Yet, somehow Wesley got away with this charade. He always used the name Wesley when he was with his family, never John, and maintained to Mrs Snipes that his airline security uniform was standard issue for any lollypop man who helped the children cross the road each morning and evening. Mrs Snipes never saw any reason to ask what Wesley did each day outside of the schools road safety requirement hours, and Wesley never volunteered any answer anyway. As far as she was concerned, he worked hard, long hours delivering children from one side of the road to the other, and this was the life he had chosen. His hard work had put a roof over their heads, food on the table and a beautiful two litre bottle of Pepsi Max (Ginger) in the fridge. Life was good and Mrs Snipes had no reason to think there was anything unusual. 

2

John Cutter arrived for work that morning like any other day. On arrival at the Airline Training Facility he was met by his long time friend and boss, Sly Delvecchio. Over the many years that John and Sly had worked together they had become more than friends, they were confidants who could tell each other anything. They had so much in common, most significantly that Sly was also leading a double life as the actor Tom Sizemore, and therefore had as much to lose as John if their secret got out. It was John that came up with Tom's nickname, Sly, based on the deceitful life that both actors had to lead if there was any chance of making their airline security business a success.

Sly passed John his agenda for the day, and John was relieved to see the familiar training schedule of staff training and roundhouse kicks to the face. John could do this stuff blindfolded, and often did to impress the ladies. But Sly knew there was something else. Sly wanted to know. Was John still driving to the airport night after night, knocking back the Hot Chocolate like it was going out of fashion? Sly had acted in the Hollywood airport security sound-stage for many years and had seen too many good men consumed by hot chocolate addiction. He and John had a friendship and Sly didn't want this good man destroying his life one sachet at a time. They'd worked too hard to make their security company a success, yet only had about eight minutes of film footage to show for it.

John wasn't in the mood to start a deep conversation anyway. He had other things on his mind. Today he had a class full of aspiring actors, eager to learn the skills, techniques and abilities required to roundhouse kick a terrorist right bang in the face. As he surveyed his team of new entrants, John couldn't take his eyes of one new student. A beautiful young actress, dressed from head to toe in full air hostess uniform. This could be the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. Because this girl, looked exactly like Lisa.

That night, Wesley spent little time with his wife and child, instead choosing to pour over the Internet Movie Database, looking for information on Marti Slayton, the woman who had entered his life unannounced that morning and stirred up all those emotions he'd tried to drown in Hot Chocolate for so long.

3

The next morning, Wesley left the house as John and headed for the studio. His evening of detective work had revealed little of interest. Marti didn't even have a photo on IMDB, or much of a film career by the looks of it. Could the actress that played Marti have also played the role of Lisa in his flashbacks? They were so unclear, deliberately so, as if to withhold vital plot information until later in the movie. His workday flew by, his mind consumed as he trained Marti in the important skills of how to deal with a terrorist by giving them a good strong roundhouse kick to the face. In a way, it was like Lisa was back in his life again. The love he'd lost had returned and he was happy. He knew in his heart that this wasn't Lisa, but then again he also know this wasn't Marti, and he wasn't John, and this wasn't even a real place of work, merely a studio set knocked up to look like an aeroplane. Taking a step back would reveal that even the plane was only the right hand half of a plane, the entire set being purpose built to house cameras, lighting and sound equipment. After work, John decided to approach Marti and invite her for a drink.

"Hey, Marti", John stumbled through the words nervously, "I was wondering, would you like to join me for a drink just now? It's been a long day and I hate to drink alone".

"Sure", replied Marti, a little apprehensively, "That sounds nice, I noticed a really nice Irish bar just over the road."

"Actually, I had somewhere in mind", replied John, "Have you tried the airport? It's a hell of a drive, but they do the most amazing hot chocolate you've ever tasted."

Marti seemed puzzled. "OK, I'll take your word for it. Let me go and freshen up, and I'll meet you outside shortly. But I have to warn you, I don't like hot chocolate. I drink coffee."

"Do you have milk in it?", John enquired.

"Why don't you try and guess", I'll bet you get it wrong.

This dialogue had become stilted and unnatural, almost as if it was the set up for a punch-line that would be way off in another chapter.

4

John and Marti arrived at the airport bar. They were the only people there without suitcases. John ordered a hot chocolate and a coffee.

"Did you work it out?" asked Marti.

"I always bet on black", replied John, reaching the punch-line much sooner than anticipated.

Marti looked surprised to hear it. Of all the possible answers in the world, John had guessed correctly. How could he have known? Perhaps this was more than just a casual meeting. Maybe it was fate for her to meet such a kindred spirit. All she could think of was how incredible this whirlwind romance had been, and that she loved this man, more deeply than she had ever loved anyone or anything ever, and she'd once eaten a KitKat Peanut Butter Chunky and they're fantastic, so she knew this was something very special.

"Time, ladies and gentlemen", announced the bartender, "let's start drinking up now please."

"Oh no", said John, "Oh not now."

"What's the matter?" asked Marti. She hated to see the love of her life looking worried.

"They just announced it's drinking up time", John muttered, "It's the end of the night, and they're closing soon. I really needed to go to the toilet. I need to go, I need to go now, and I'm really needing to do a poo. I'm sorry to be so graphic, but they're closing and I can't do a poo that quickly. I'll keep you waiting, I'll keep the bar staff waiting. This is terrible."

"No problem John, darling", Marti replied reassuringly.

"God Damn it Lisa, I don't have time for this shit!", John snapped.

Marti looked shocked, then upset.

"You called me Lisa!", Marti said, obviously hurt. This was the man she was to marry and suddenly, out of nowhere there was another woman on the scene. Everything had been going so well, all evening and now this.

"I'm sorry", John looked sheepish, "but maybe we should talk about this tomorrow. I said something I shouldn't have said. I guess I had one too many hot chocolates tonight."

"Take me home, John" demanded Marti.

The unnecessarily long journey home from the unnecessarily far away airport after all those unnecessary hot chocolates was the most unnecessarily uncomfortable drives of John's life. John realised he'd messed up big time by calling Marti by the wrong name. The silence between John and Marti filled his Dacia Duster car for the whole journey. After dropping Marti off at her apartment, John realised he had a bigger problem. He was now Wesley again and would need to explain to Mrs Snipes why he'd been out till such a late hour.

At the Snipes household an argument ensued. Wesley had tried to convince Mrs Snipes that a long line of schoolchildren had all wanted to cross the road at once, and there were so many of them that he had no choice but to stand in the middle of the road until they had all crossed safely. It was past midnight at this point and Mrs Snipes was having none of it. The argument raged on until Mrs Snipes yelled out an accusation that she knew Wesley was seeing another woman. She'd heard him talking in his sleep, and he'd said Lisa's name more than once.

"Dammit, Mrs Snipes, I don't have time for this shit!", yelled Wesley, as he stormed out of the room, and stomped up the stairs to bed, "I'm going to sleep, I have to wake up at seven".

"I know you do", whispered Mrs Snipes to herself, "you have a busy day tomorrow."

Wesley didn't know it, but Mrs Snipes also had a secret.

5

Wesley left the house as John, his uniform pressed and ironed perfectly. He jumped in his Dacia and headed off to the studio. Mrs Snipes hadn't said two words to him all morning, and Wesley, his obvious lies catching up with him, had failed to make amends, despite pleading on his knees in the kitchen during breakfast. John didn't know however that his delayed arrival the previous night was just what Mrs Snipes had needed. She too had been extremely late home and was relieved when she found the house was empty. Her ongoing plan had almost been foiled as she'd been stuck in terrible traffic on her way home but Wesley's late arrival meant he knew nothing of Mrs Snipes' activities and everything was on course. As Mrs Snipes poured a Pepsi Max (Ginger) from the fridge, she dialled on her cell-phone and turned to face the camera in a mean and moody pose. An audible click came from the handset. Mrs Snipes spoke into the handset.

"Notify my people, they'll know what to do".

Snapping the phone in half in her bare hands, Mrs Snipes disposed of the handset into the kitchen bin. She walked slowly upstairs into the bathroom and stared into the mirror. Taking a razor blade from the cabinet she started to scrape away at her left cheek. The skin started to tear and Mrs Snipes peeled it away and dropped each small piece of skin into the sink. As more and more skin tore away, she looked back into the cabinet mirror at regular intervals, allowing anyone watching to see her face changing one stage at at time, in an impressive display of special effects worthy of Stan Winston. As more flesh fell away from her face, new features were revealed. A man's features. Mrs Snipes' expression was one of pure menace and anger as she pulled away at her hairline, her entire perm coming away in one piece. Below it, a manicured head of blond, male hair.

Mrs Snipes was not Mrs Snipes. In the acting performance of his career, the debonair English actor Bruce Payne had played this challenging role, flawlessly, for the past 8 years.

This morning, Bruce has a new character to add to his already impressive CV. And plane to catch.

6

Tom Sizemore, as Sly Delvecchio, stood at the front of the mock aeroplane ready to make his speech.

"Ladies and Gentlemen. I'd like to thank you all for the past six weeks. I know it's been a lot of hard work, and I know that our schedule has been punishing. Having said that, I'm very pleased to be able to announce that you have all been successful. Each and every one of you on board this plane has the ability to roundhouse kick a terrorist in the face. Congratulations."

John stood up next to Sly, and started to hand out a pile of certificates to the excited cabin crew. As he held out Marti's certificate, she turned away from him, obviously still upset about the previous evening.

"God Damn it Marti, I don't have time for this shit!" exclaimed John.

John was left in no uncertain position. The woman he'd barely spoke to before yesterday had become madly in love with him in seconds, but he'd hurt her badly. He returned to Sly, with the one remaining certificate in his hand. Sly could tell there was tension between them.

"Come on John, this is stupid", offered Sly, "You're a professional. You're better than this. Don't let a girl come between you and this acting job. You're the best at what you do, and we need you today more than ever. We have an unexpected surprise for the crew."

"Is there any other kind?" retorted John, wearily.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I have your attention again please", Sly began, "We're both so proud of you all, we have an announcement to make. Today, for the first time, we are taking this baby up. Tonight our aeroplane studio set will be pretending to fly at thirty thousand feet, and we will be taking real travellers on board to a fictional destination!"

Every one of the cabin crew high-fived and whooped like Americans do. All but one. Marti wasn't playing today.

"There's no time like the present!" continued Sly, "so places everyone please, and let's make this happen!"

The cabin crew did as instructed. The aeroplane door was opened and a cast of willing extras stepped foot onto the aircraft, some dragging luggage, some wearing sombreros, many lugging carrier bags of duty free with them. The cabin crew greeted each of them with a smile and a cheery hello. Everyone was excited and in high spirits, apart from Marty, who had retreated to the rear of the vessel, keeping a close eye on everything that was happening, whilst avoiding John. In the excitement of their first pretend flight, only Marti noticed that one of the passengers looked very familiar. As well as knowing that she'd seen her somewhere before, this passenger was wearing an unusually long fur coat and large sunglasses. Her entire body was covered and there was good reason for this. Underneath, this passenger was hiding a full airline cabin crew uniform. Yet, even without knowing this, Marti realised where she had seen her before. Marti had seen her in "that dress". She'd been in the movie Bedazzled, alongside Brendan Frazer. It was Elizabeth Hurley. And that spelled trouble.

Elizabeth Hurley mingled into a crowd of passengers, all battling to put their baggage in the overhead lockers at once. The fur coat slipped off, was thrown above into storage, and immediately Elizabeth Hurley took on her new role, helping others put their luggage away too. She was no longer the actress and model Elizabeth Hurley. She was cabin crew. And in a testament to her acting prowess, no-one but Marti noticed.

Meanwhile, another passenger was anonymously boarding the plane. If he'd been more famous, maybe the cabin crew checking tickets would have spotted the discrepancy on the passport. The name Charles Raine appeared on the ticket also, but the face was clearly the actor Bruce Payne. Sadly, at the time Bruce had not appeared in many films and boarded the plane without being recognised. As he took his seat, he saw Elizabeth Hurley loading baggage into the lockers, and they exchanged glances. Everything was going to plan. Charles had boarded, his top assassin, Elizabeth Hurley had joined undetected and he'd got the extra legroom he'd requested. Everything was perfect. And they all said he was crazy. Crazy to hijack a pretend aircraft, crazy to expect extra legroom and crazy for choosing one of the worlds most recognisable women to be his accomplice. But he knew he wasn't crazy. He sat in his seat, awaiting pretend take off, muttering to himself.

"Charles Raine is not insane. Charles Raine is not insane. Charles Raine is Bruce Payne. Charles Raine is Bruce Payne, sitting in the exit lane on a plane."

Sly announced he would be taking his seat, and wished all the flight crew the best of luck. John went to take his seat, the same seat he took on every mock flight the studio flew. He sat at seat 57B. For John Cutter. IS. Passenger. 57. B.

7

As the plane vibration was turned up to simulate cruising at thirty thousand feet, Sly got up and headed for 58B to have a chat with John. After some pleasantries and small-talk, Sly got to the point.

"So John, what is it between you and Marti? There's tension there. What's going on?"

"OK, Sly, you have a right to know. Just look at her, Sly. Look at her. Can you see it?"

"Sorry John, you're going to need to be clearer for me."

"She looks exactly like... Oh Jesus Sly, look at her. Tell me she's not Lisa."

Sly was taken aback by this observation and became quickly flustered as he tried to think of a response that didn't come. Sly got up from his seat and mumbled about having to go and check something. Sly arrived back at his own seat at the front of the plane and gripped the armrests tightly. He knew this day would come. He knew that John would ask questions about Lisa. If there was ever a messed up situation, this was it. Here, at a simulated thirty thousand feet there would be no escape. John knew Sly was Tom, and Sly knew John was Wesley. But Sly knew Lisa was Lisa, and Lisa was Lisa because Lisa didn't exist.

Of course, Lisa did exist, in scripted, harrowing flashbacks, in black and white, with just enough detail for viewers to know something tragic had happened. However, Lisa had only existed in the script for the movie Passenger 57 that was being filmed in the studios. John had loved Lisa deeply, so much so that he had such feelings of guilt when it came to his marriage to Mrs Snipes. Wesley knew so many people with double lives, yet in his own double life he'd fallen in love with a woman who only existed in one of these lives, leaving him lonely and alone and drinking himself to death with hot chocolate in his real life. Wesley's incredible acting talent had made the bit part of Lisa so real that he couldn't separate the real life from the fiction. The only person who knew about Lisa was Tom, and Tom, as Sly, now had to break this news to Wesley as John.

Sly sat with his head in his hands. He didn't even see Charles Raine stand up. He didn't see Charles Raine walk calmly to the front of the plane. He didn't see Charles Raine open the door to the cockpit.

8

"Who's in charge?" demanded Raine.

The captain and his co-pilot turned to face the man who had burst into their cockpit.

"I am" replied the captain.

Raine pulled a revolver from his inside jacket pocket. One bullet pierced the skull of the unknown extra playing the shortest lived role in cinema history.

"Once again", asked Raine, turning to the co-pilot, "Who's in charge?"

"He was", replied the co-pilot, "and you shot him! Why did you do that? You shot the pilot! You're crazy!"

"Charles Raine is not insane!" chanted Charles Raine who was clearly insane, "Now, who is in charge?"

The co-pilot, obviously in shock, repeated, "He was in charge and now he's dead, what did you do that for?"

"Oh come on man", exasperated Charles, "you're supposed to say 'you are!' – I'll ask you one last time, who is in charge?"

"Oh I get it", said the co-pilot, "yes, you are. Very good".

Raine made is way into the cabin, and located Elizabeth Hurley who was pushing a drinks trolley.

"Oh Stewardess! Make me a Bloody Mary".

Elizabeth knew her cue.

"Certainly Sir. And how would you like it?"

"Bloody".

Elizabeth reached into the trolley, pulled out her gun, and proceeded to shoot every member of cabin crew, one by one.

Passengers screamed. Panic ensued. Silence fell when Charles Raine shot his gun into the air. You can do that on a pretend aircraft, it's fine.

"Everyone! Sit down, and face front", growled Charles.

Between them, Elizabeth and Charles walked the length of the plane, and observed every passenger. With all of them too scared to move or turn around, the attackers were confident they had control of the plane.

They could not have known that there should have been a passenger in seat 57B. Everything seemed under control. They could not have known that John Cutter, Airline Security had gone to the toilet to take a dump, just moments before Charles Raine had begun his hijack. Once again, John Cutter found he didn't have time for this shit.

9

Marti was scared but safe. Cramped inside Elizabeth Hurley's drinks trolley she'd managed to remain hidden whilst the rest of the cabin crew faced total annihilation. Now that Hurley had joined Raine at the front of the plane, it was up to Marti to get from the trolley to the only other place she knew she would be able to hide. The aircraft toilet. As stealthily as she could, she clambered out of the trolley and crouching behind it to obscure her from view she contemplated her next move. As she saw Charles and Elizabeth enter the cockpit, she took her chance and ran as fast as she could to the toilet. Just as John opened the door to leave the cubicle, he saw Marti heading right for him. She leaped into the bathroom and John closed and locked the door again.

Marti was hysterical.

"Oh my God, John, they're shooting people. They shot all the crew, and the captain. They would have shot me too if I hadn't hidden in the drinks trolley."

"Look Marti, I know this isn't the best time, but I think we need to talk about what happened last night."

"What? We're in trouble here John!"

"I know. I thought we had something special. I'm so sorry that I called you Lisa. It's just that, you remind me of someone I used to know. I'm sorry but when I first laid eyes on you, I thought you were her. But she died, in an unclear, fuzzy, black and white flashback. I have been wracking my brains to remember what happened but I can't. I know that I was there when she died, but I don't know what happened. It's like, all my memories of Lisa are fuzzy and out of focus."

"John, pull yourself together, we're in the middle of a hijack situation".

"I'm sorry I upset you Marti. I'm a simple man. I'm not who you think I am. I'm an actor. I live in a modest house. I don't earn a lot of money. I drive a leased Dacia".

"What did you say?"

"A leased Dacia".

"Oh shit", said Marti, apparently busted, "how did you find out?"

John was confused. Marti asked again.

"How did you find out? Did someone tell you?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about Marti".

"Look, it's fine that you know, you can call me Alex now."

Marti hadn't been listening as John poured out his heart to her in the aeroplane toilet because she was preoccupied by the ongoing hijack situation. This lapse of concentration had blown her cover. She too was an actress, Alex Datcher, hired to play a role in the action movie. And in the confusion, Alex had no choice but to explain this to John. He was incredulous. Everyone he knew seemed to have a secret double life.

"And another thing", Alex continued, "the cabin crew lady with the gun? She's no assassin. She's Elizabeth Hurley (from Bedazzled). She's probably never fired a real gun in her life. We can take her."

"I don't understand, why do we need to take her down if she's an actress?"

"She's being paid to play the role. She has to protect Charles Raine. But we don't know if he's an actor or not. If we go after Charles, Elizabeth will shoot us. We need to get her out of the way so we can find out if Charles is a terrorist or an actor playing the part of a terrorist. Luckily, I have some information that might be able to help us in this situation. I know Charles Raine's one and only weakness"

"What is it?"

"He cannot withstand a roundhouse kick to the face."

10

John flushed and went to wash his hands, but no water came from the taps. He formulated a plan. He would use the confusion over what was real and what was a movie to his advantage. He told Marti to stay put in the cubicle, which didn't go down well as, like the taps, the toilet was a movie prop with no water supply or flush mechanism and John's massive brown trout wasn't going anywhere. John composed himself and took a deep breath, which he immediately regretted in the circumstances. He stepped out of the toilet and confidently walked back down the plane, towards Elizabeth Hurley.

"And... CUT. Excellent work everyone, well done", John announced, applauding towards the assembled cast and crew

Instinctively, everyone on the set took a breather and relaxed. All the dead cabin crew picked themselves up from the floor.

"We're going to take 15 minutes guys, so get yourselves refreshed and be back here for quarter past", John continued.

A catering crew erected a portable table and handed out coffee and cake to the appreciative cast of Passenger 57. Elizabeth Hurley especially enjoyed her Battenburg. She was so engrossed in the colourful sugary snack that she didn't hear John Cutter creeping up behind her.

"Hey, Elizabeth", John whispered, "I have something for you."

"Can't this wait until I have finished my cake?"

"No", replied John, menacingly, "I'm going to kill you during."

Elizabeth's face momentarily showed her disgust, but that feeling didn't last as John slipped his pocket knife into her back. Elizabeth fell to the floor, and John slinked back away from the cake-hungry crowds. As the rest of the group saw that Elizabeth had collapsed, all attention went towards that end of studio and John sneaked back towards the plane. It was time to confront Charles Raine, to kick Charles Raine square in the face with a roundhouse kick. This was the roundhouse kick to the face that John had been preparing for all of his life.

John approached the cockpit and kicked down the door with a super smooth roundhouse kick, right in the door's face. Charles Raine turned to face John, apparently unfazed by the sudden arrival.

"Ah, Mr Cutter", started Charles, "How good of you to join us".

"This is where you get off the plane Charles"

"I will miss it when I'm gone. This has been a good role for me, a challenging role, and one that I have enjoyed immensely."

"It's over, Charles"

"Damn it. I thought so. This film had the potential to be a classic in the action drama genre, but production has been beset with problems from day one. They've done a really great job considering the setbacks. But this latest thing is the last straw. They'll never be able to recover from what you did."

"What are you talking about?"

"You murdered Elizabeth Hurley. You lost your grip on reality Wesley. You're unwell, you need help. The stress of your double life has taken its toll on your mental health and you've snapped."

"God damn you, Raine"

"I need you to listen to me, Wesley. I'm not Charles Raine. I'm the actor Bruce Payne. I was hired to play this role. I accepted the job because I wanted to help you. I've always wanted to help you. I've been trying to help you for the last 8 years Wesley. I need you to listen to me, and understand. I've been hired to look after you. I'm trying to keep you safe. I've been living with you, observing you and looking after you ever since that day you snapped. Eight years ago you walked out on your job as a lollypop crossing man, convinced you were working in airline security. This was the day after you watched Passenger 57 on DVD with Mrs Snipes. She was so worried about you that she called us."

"I don't understand. Who did she call? Who are you?"

"We're the Screen Actors Guild for Mental Health. I'm Bruce Payne, the company chairman. I came in that day and took over from Mrs Snipes. I've been your wife for eight years. We've been trying to help you by making your life feel as normal as possible. We've kept this whole charade going to keep you safe and well."

"Does Sly know about this?"

"Of course. You busted Sly ages ago – you worked out that he's really the actor Tom Sizemore and confronted him at the time. He had no choice but to tell you. But you didn't realise the scale of our process. The truth is, everyone on this plane is an actor. This studio, everyone, everything, it's all for you John. It's to help you get better."

"And what about Lisa?"

"Lisa is a character in a flashback scene in a movie you loved. She was played by Alex, in soft focus so you couldn't really make out who she was. You remember loving Lisa and you have flashbacks in black-and-white, but that's all they are. Flashbacks. They never happened. It was a movie."

"But Alex, she looks just like Lisa".

"That's because she was Lisa, she played the role in the flashbacks when they were filmed. But things have taken a turn. Alex has fallen in love with you, instantly. She wants you Wesley. She's waiting in the pretend toilet you just took a dump in. You need to go to her and talk to her. But be quick. You just stabbed Elizabeth Hurley to death and the police are surely on their way."

The Screen Actors Guild for Mental Health appeared on the news that night, saying that important lessons needed to be learned to prevent a similar catastrophe happening in the future. Bruce Payne, now dressed in a business suit took questions from journalists, and stood by his company's success record, explaining how many people they had helped with their unorthodox methods. They could not have predicted that the subject of this process, Wesley Snipes, had the talent to back up his delusion. He was more than just a crazy man who thought he was an actor. He was a weapons expert and a genuine action hero. He carried his knives discreetly on his person and knew exactly how to use them. Elizabeth Hurley didn't stand a chance. Procedures would be improved, lessons would be learned, the company would be strong and stable, Bruce explained, to prevent this kind of accident in the future.

John was sent down for 10 years for the murder of the actress Elizabeth Hurley, and Alex continued to visit him every week. She loved him more than ever. Despite the last eight years of his life being a work of fiction, Alex knew that John was prepared to kill to protect the woman who loved him. True love is greater than the movie industry. True love is stronger than mental illness. True love wins out, even when your man leaves you in an aeroplane toilet with an un-flushable, stinking turd. And as the credits rolled over the final scene, Alex knew that ten years was not a long time to wait to be with him.

This was a man who would do anything for her. He'd kill to protect her. The prison sentence would pass. She could continue to visit, and they had ten years to get to know each other. That was long enough. They had plenty of time for this shit.


End file.
